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The Blessing of Heartbreak

Are you heart broken? Has your heart been broken? The emotions that come with heartbreak are many but they are easily imaginable: pain, hurt, distrust, anger, shame, disappointment and other feelings. Consider this scenario: you're praying for someone, or desiring this person (him or her).  You want to marry them but the story ends with them being with someone else. Heart break is not limited to romantic relationships but it can be related to any severe disappointment we face. Romantic relationships may arguably be one of the most painful disappointments to endure; but that's not the point. The point is that heart break can feel unfathomable depending on the circumstances surrounding the situation--especially when trusting God for a potential spouse. The pain and hurt is deep; but maybe it's less painful when you realize that this is NOT where the story ends. What if there is another emotion or sentiment that you can experience in the midst of heartbreak that actually makes the heart break a blessing? Well, there is. Although hurt and grief may be evident, there is a blessing to discover in the midst of this devastation. Would you be surprised to know that joy and gratitude can be emotions and sentiments that accompany heartbreak and disappointment? Here's the blessing in heart break: "God, I thank you that I am not connected to a puzzle piece that does not fit me." Let's stick to the example of marital relationships and heart breaks. There is something mysterious and unique about two people coming together in marriage (Proverbs 30:18-19). Such a union warrants total devotion, unity and harmony between the two individuals (Amos 3:3). It's like a puzzle piece. Many puzzle pieces are connected but some are connected directly. Only those pieces that have the right shape and form are connected directly or at the closest point. Why should you try to fit two puzzle pieces together that do not fit one another? Each piece has its designated and corresponding piece, that when they come together fit perfectly. This is the same when it comes to relationships, jobs, decisions and opportunities in our lives. Not everything we come in contact with is God's will for our lives. Consider John 6:15 when people wanted to make Jesus their king--an enticing opportunity that Jesus refused knowing this it was not God's will for His life. Sometimes two puzzle pieces can seem like they fit together initially. You try to put them together and they actually insert into one another. Unfortunately, after adding the other puzzle pieces on the board you realize that those two pieces aren't actually meant to be connected the way you originally thought. Once the puzzle board is almost fully assembled, you notice that two of the pieces that fit together actually should not be connected that way in order to complete the puzzle and display the proper illustration. Remember as child when you finished the puzzle but there  were one or two pieces remaining and a hole somewhere on the board but the leftover pieces wouldn't fit? Something was connected incorrectly. If marital relationships are about collective purpose and destiny and expressing the image of God through a union, what if you need to be connected to the right puzzle piece, in order to fully illustrate the purpose God has called you to and the image He wants you to reflect? You will think differently about connections with people, relationships and marital partners and opportunities when you see the big picture. Some pieces only fit initially because you didn't see the entire puzzle and not realizing that there was a more appropriate puzzle piece to connect to. God's will and purpose is the big picture. Sometimes connections and relationships seem right until we have a greater understanding and insight into God's will. This goes for opportunities as well: "God why didn't this work out, what happened to that job, why didn't she and I get married, etc." God's plan and purpose makes the puzzle make sense; in other words, the confusing parts about our lives and disappointments will only make sense as we see deeper into God's plan and purpose for our lives. The topic of life partners is no different. The story doesn't end with heartbreak. The story is still being written; your puzzle piece is yet to join you. Be patient, be joyful, be expectant. I know it's easier said than done, but choose to do it. When God asks you to have faith He is asking you to see the unseen. When He asks you to see the unseen He is asking you to not look at the person you missed out on but the person or opportunity He has coming to you. This requires that you believe in His goodness toward you more than the hurt you feel; this effectively produces hope and strength. This requires that you believe in God's character more than your situation. What characteristic is that? That He is good. Therefore you're good and you will be good, even though you're hurt Yes your heart hurts but you're not heartbroken. Your heart isn't broken; its still available for the right person who's meant to connect with it. Your puzzle piece awaits you. That's the blessing of heart break.


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